Thursday, August 4, 2011

Kellan Lutz Rents New Crib in Venice

WHO: Kellan Lutz

WHERE: Venice, CA

PRICE: $7,250 per month

SIZE: 2,400 square feet, 4 bedrooms, 4 bathrooms



YOUR MAMAS NOTES: In 2009 chisel-chested male model turned concrete-bodied actor Kellan Lutz asked his brother Randy to find him a roommate or two for the frumpy Van Nuys, CA house property records show he purchased in late 2005 for $715,000. The brother put a suggestively worded ad on Craigs List that stated he/they were "alcohol friendly" and "looking for very athletic guys" to move in and splash around with in the swimming pool and hot tub. It wasn't long before a gaggle of gym-toned gay gentleman were ringing Mister Lutz's bell. It was all, according to Mister Lutz, a laugh riot case of unfortunate wordsmithing by his bro Randy.



So that none of the children think Your Mama is insinuating something about Mister Kellan's proclivities that we know not a damn thing about: Until recently Mister Kellan was frequently reported to be hooked up with 90210 blond bomber AnnaLynne McCord. Previous to that he was romantically linked to actress Kayla Ewell–another member of what we think of as the Tinseltown Vampire Brigade–who shakes her money maker in The Vampire Diaries.



A few near pornographic underwear ads and a couple of bit acting parts in the mid-Noughts led beau-hunky blond Mister Lutz to a recurring role on the lone season of the sitcom The Comeback with Lisa Kudrow. A few more bit parts brought Mister Lutz to 2008 when he was lucky enough to be cast as muscle-bound teenage blood sucker Emmet Cullen in Twilight. The seemingly ceaseless Twilight franchise, a showbiz super-phenomena of epic money-making and cross-marketing proportions, quickly catapulted Mister Lutz to the pinnacle of gossip glossy fame. It's unlikely the meticulously man-scaped lamb can go to the damn 7-11 anymore with out a t(w)eenage girl, lonely lady or horny homo collapsing to the floor in the beer aisle from a burning rush of unrequited love and unrestrained lust.



Your Mama isn't sure if any alcohol friendly athletic dudes moved into Mister Lutz's 3 bedroom and 3 pooper bachelor pad in Van Nuys. We did, however, recently receive a covert communique from our friend and celebrity real estate snitch Lucy Spillerguts who whispered in Your Mama's big ear that Mister Lutz has done decamped the suburban streets of Van Nuys for the boho beach community of Venice where he recently leased a somewhat newly (re)constructed contempo-Craftsman-style crib just a few blocks from the beach near the Venice canals.



Listing information for the pristine-looking property that Your Mama cajoled up out of the interweb shows the two-story shingled residence measures around 2,400 square feet, includes 4 bedrooms and 4 bathrooms, and was leased by Mister Kellan at a rate of $7,250 per month.



A deep inset front porch with stacked-stone columns defines the entry to the fully re-habbed house with an open plan ground floor that orbits around a (melo)dramatic floating stone, wood and wrought iron stair case. The L-shaped main living space stretches across the back of the house and includes a living room with wide-plank wood floors and stacked stone double-sided fireplace. Banks of wood-framed glass panels flank the fireplace and open up to merge the room with the courtyard-like backyard. The living room area spills into a long dining room/kitchen with built-in buffet, center-island, mahogany cabinets, thinly veined black granite counter tops and super-sized commercial style stainless steel appliances.



Mister Kellan's new master suite on the second floor sports wood floors, an awkwardly located fireplace with flat-screen tee-vee mounted above it, walk-in closet, and wood-framed French doors that connect to a private balcony that hangs over the backyard. The clean-lined master crapper conveniently provides two sinks set into one long white marble counter top, a soaking tub long enough for Mister Kellan and a friend, and an over-sized shower space with flooring fashioned from randomly shaped slate pieces set into a bed of black pebbles. No one loves a natural element like rocks used for art or day-core more than Your Mama. We've been known to display piles of carefully curated rocks in our own home. Howevuh, we sincerely hope those shower floor pebbles are glued down and not scattered around loose where they could be a real and annoying pain in the tootsies.



Like most beach communities in California, lots tend towards tiny in Venice so in addition to the front porch and private balcony in the master bedroom, outdoor space was maximized with a sunbather beckoning roof deck and a tree-shaded backyard with flagstone terrace and Buddha-guarded koi pond. A detached structure–probably originally built as a garage–was converted to a home office/entertainment space with over-sized flat screen tee-vee and 10-speaker surround sound system. Sadly, the property lacks a swimming pool where porn-bodied Mister Lutz can horse around and play Marco Polo with his pin thin gal pals and buff man-buddies.



Property records show that Mister Lutz still owns his house in Van Nuys and a cursory look around did not turn up any (online) evidence of currently being on the (open) market.