Funnyman Jim Carrey Lists Malibu Colony Crib

SELLER: Jim Carrey
LOCATION: Malibu, CA
PRICE: $13,950,000
SIZE: 2,866 square feet, 5 bedrooms, 5.5 bathrooms

YOUR MAMAS NOTES: For almost a year Canadian-born comedian Jim Carrey has been a hot topic in all the property gossip columns and (celebrity) real estate oriented blogs from Brooklyn to Malibu. Not only has the L.A.-based Golden Globe winner been repeatedly spotted checking out a-lister digs in New York City, he's just put his ocean front beach house inside the 24-hour guarded gates of Malibu Colony in Malibu, CA on the market with an asking price of $13,950,000.

This isn't, as it turns out, Mister Carrey's first turn on the bucking bronco at this particular real estate rodeo. The folks at Redfin show Mister Carrey first (an unsuccessfully) attempted to unload he seaside bedsit between June and December 2011 when it was listed, de-listed and re-listed a couple of times at a couple of prices.

Always on (and sometimes annoying) Mister Carrey has mucked around Hollywood since the early 1980s but it wasn't until he was cast as the elastic-faced white guy on the sketch comedy program In Living Color in 1990 that he really started up his ladder of fame of fortune. A lot of really stupid but often high-grossing comedies followed including (but far from limited to) Ace Ventura: Pet Detective, The Mask, Dumb & Dumber and The Cable Guy, an horrific cinematic turd that reportedly earned him a gasp-inducing $20,000,000 paycheck.

Mister Carrey wisely shifted gears in the late 1990s with less hokey-jokey roles in The Truman Show and Man on the Moon. Since the turn of the 21st century Mister Carrey has careened from low-brow comedies like Bruce Almighty, Yes Man and Mister Popper's Penguins to more artsy and (arguably) dignified ditties like Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind, Lemony Snicket's A Series of Unfortunate Events and I Love You Phillip Morris.

Property records and the long-legged blond at Trulia Luxe Living both reveal Mister Carrey scooped up his ocean front crib in Malibu Colony in October 2002 for $9,750,000.

Current listing information puts the house at a fairly modest (and small-sounding) 2,866 square feet with a total of 5 bedrooms and 5.5 bathrooms that include a staff suite and second floor master suite with head-on ocean view, fireplace flanked by custom-fitted cabinetry, a built-in flat screen screen tee-vee, private pooper, walk-in closet and direct access to a glass-railed terrace perfect for star-gazing and post-coital smoking.

A narrow walkway runs alongside the attached two-car garage to the front door that opens into a tile-floored, open-plan main living area and floating staircase embellished some of the most upsetting artwork—or "artwork"—on which Your Mama has ever had the displeasure to lay our boozy eyes. We well understand that beauty (and art) is deeply personal and held in the eye of the beholder but the gnarled and twisted, multi-colored driftwood hoozymagoozy affixed to the staircase gives Your Mama and The Dr. Cooter both a bone-chilling case of the willies and the sponge-painted banister is, well, unspeakable as are the pair of "paintings" on the towering wall of frosted glass behind the staircase.

The open plan main living space includes a living room with fireplace, built-in wood cabinets and a flat screen tee-vee with a truly gawd awful sponge-painted frame; a dining room with built-in storage buffet and frosted windows along one wall; a well-equipped kitchen with flat-fronted maple (or maybe birch) cabinetry that extend clear to the ceiling, speckled (and dated-looking) granite counter tops, a Suburu-sized center island with snack counter, and a slew of high-grade stainless steel appliances.

A built-in wet bar separates the living/dining/kitchen space from the kind of wee, window-wrapped family room that spills out through floor-to-ceiling glass sliders to a good-sized deck—with planks laid at a 45-degree angle to the house—that accommodates an outdoor dining area, surfboard storage racks, built-in barbecue center and elevated sunbathing and ocean-watching platform. Listing information indicates the deck has removable privacy walls for when Mister Carry and his guests want to run around nekkid on the deck without being seen by any people or paps who might be strolling and trolling along the thin strip of sand between the house and the surf. A third floor roof terrace is outfitted with more sun bathing loungers, an above ground spa tub and—according to listing information—mood lighting.

Malibu Colony has a long and storied history of wealthy and/or high-profile property owners who include (but are far from limited to) Barbara Stanwyk, Gloria Swanson, Jackie Collins, Linda Ronstadt and Jane Leeves. Tom Hanks owns two houses, one on the water and one directly across the street. At some point in the past Sting and Trudie Styler leased their Malibu Colony residence to Leonardo DiCaprio who now owns his own 7 bedroom and 6 bathroom crib in the Colony recently put up for lease at $75,000 per month. Survivor producer and The Apprentice creator Mark Burnett and wife Roma Downey own a house in Malibu Colony as does spike-haired super-producer Brian Grazer who's had his three-story beach front digs on and off the market for years. British-born action flick stud Jason Statham recently bought in Malibu Colony and Ted Danson and Mary Steenburgen recently sold. Peri Gilpin (Fraser, Hot in Cleveland) bought her land-side beach house two summers ago for $3,550,000 from Shabby Chic queen Rachel Ashwell and Tinseltown tart Pamela Anderson reportedly almost went broke remodeling her land-side house in Malibu Colony. Media mogul Jerry Perenchioowns—by our unscientific count—at least a dozen homes in Malibu Colony as well as the adjacent private golf course that sits behind tall walls between the exclusive enclave and the Pacific Coast Highway.

In addition to he Malibu residence, Mister Carrey has long owned an 8,028 square foot sprawler with guest house, swimming pool and tennis court in L.A.'s low-key but high-priced Brentwood area he bought, according to property records, in July 1994 for $3,800,000. In early 2000 he dropped another $1,700,000 on the 1.02 acre lot next door with separate (but connected) gated entrance, small parking area, meandering lawns and plaza-sized entertainment terrace.

Mister Carrey's nearby neighbors in Brentwood include night time chat show host Conan O'Brien, entertainment industry executive Marc Weinstock and tabloid-embattled movie star John Travolta and his wife Kelly Preston.

As he thins his west coast property portfolio multiple reports reveal Mister Carrey would like to acquire a New York City pied-a-terre. Last year he leased a swank apartment at one of the star-studded, Richard Meier-designed green glass towers that lord over a lower section of the West Side Highway in the far West Village and he was said to be shopping for a downtown pad in the $5-8,000,000 range. More recently he's been spotted peeping at a titanic triplex penthouse in Brooklyn's Dumbo 'hood listed at $19,000,000 and a 7,000 (ish) square foot townhouse in the the the art gallery-filled Cheslea neighborhood with an asking price of $13,650,000.

listing photos: Sotheby's International Realty / Pacific Palisades

Afternoon Tidbit: Lena Dunham Buys in Brooklyn

BUYER: Lena Dunham
LOCATION: Brooklyn, NY (Cobble Hill)
PRICE: $500,000
SIZE: (approximately) 800 square feet, 1 bedroom, 1 bathroom

YOUR MAMAS NOTES: A little birdie in Brooklyn chirped to Your Mama that up-and-coming filmmaker, screenwriter and actress Lena Dunham recently bought her first bachelorette pad apartment in the tony and genteel Brooklyn Heights 'hood just across the murky East River from lower Manhattan.

A brief but none-the-less exhausting search of the interweb indicates the Brooklyn Heights apartment picked up by Miss Dunham in mid-March (2012) wasn't on the open market but property records and other online documentation do reveal she coughed up $500,000 for an approximately 800 square foot, 1 bedroom and 1 bathroom co-operative apartment on the top floor of Mansion House, a large and dignified, pre-war doorman building just around the corner from the Clark Street subway station on a fairly narrow but urbanely charming tree-lined street. Unfortunately for the curious, that's about all the details we have about Miss Dunham's new digs.

Twenty six year old Miss Dunham created and currently stars as the endearingly clunky, slightly zaftig and hardly employed Hannah Horvath on the Judd Apatow-produced coming-of-age comedy Girls, a smart and hipsterish (if a weensy bit precious) boob-toob send up of early Sex and The City without all the Manolos and shiny Tinseltown tinsel.

Before Girls Miss Dunham earned accolades and attention for writing and starring in the quirky, 2010 feature-length film Tiny Furniture, a sort of semi-autobiographical story of an unsatisfied recent graduate of a liberal arts college in the Midwest who moves back in to her mother's loft in New York City's TriBeCa neighborhood. Miss Dunham, dontcha know, graduated from Oberlin and comes by her creative bent quite genetically as the older daughter of accomplished Pictures Generation artist Laurie Simmons and (orifice-obsessed) painter Carroll Dunham who live—you got it—in a big ol' loft in TriBeCa, the very same loft, as it turns out, featured in Tiny Furniture.

We expect more (and probably increasingly mainstream) films and television programs will be created by Miss Dunham and with her fast-tracked climb up the Showbiz ladder of fame and fortune Your Mama anticipates Miss Dunham will make a real estate upgrade in 2-3 years. Then again, what do we know? We shall see, butter beans, we shall see.

exterior photo: Google

Michael C. Hall Splits and Sells

SELLER: Michael C. Hall
LOCATION: Los Angeles, CA
PRICE: $1,995,000
SIZE: 3,525 square feet, 4 bedrooms, 3 full, 1 half and 1 one-quarter bathrooms

YOUR MAMAS NOTES: Yesterday, after a long drive home down the dramatic and sunny California coast, Your Mama decided to jump right back in the celebrity real estate saddle and spent a few minutes perusing some of the newer listings in Los Angeles. We quickly came across a contemporary crib in the star-stocked Outpost Estates neighborhood described on current listing information as a "celebrity-owned" and the celebrity owner, as per our rudimentary research, is accomplished stage and screen actor Michael C. Hall who has his hillside house in the Hollywood Hills up for grabs with a $1,995,000 price tag.

Mister Hall, in case y'all don't know, has a background in the thee-ay-tuh and has tread the boards both on and off Broadway in scores of musical productions like Chicago and any number of Shakespearean ditties. His big Showbiz break came in the early Aughts when he was cast as a conflicted and closeted homosexual funeral home director on Six Feet Under. Currently and for the last six seasons Mister Hall has shaken his good-lookin' money maker as a creepy, blood splatter pattern analyst who also happens to be a vigilante serial killer on Dexter, a role that has earned him five Emmy nominations and four Golden Globe nominations (plus one Golden Globe win).

Property records indicate Mister Hall purchased his Outpost Estates residence in April 2008 for $1,750,000. This was just 7 or 8 months before he married Jennifer Carpenter who plays his adoptive sister on Dexter. The couple announced they'd split up in late 2010 and their union was officially and legally terminated in December 2011. The divorce may (or may not) have something to do with Mister Hall putting his L.A. home on the market.

Current listing information shows the three-story house, tucked into a steep, up-sloping lot on a quiet and curvaceous canyon road, was originally built in 1933 and was the private residence of master mid-century modern architect Hal Leavitt from 1964 to 2004. There are a total of 4 bedrooms and 3 full and one half and one quarter bathroom, according to marketing materials.

The main floor entry sits high above the street with a half flight stairs that descend into the voluminous, living room with fireplace, blond wood floors, pitched and painted wood-beam ceiling, and over-sized windows with canyon and mountain views. The original dining room is now a sitting room  with built-in wet bar with open shelving, and the existing dining room was added at the back of the house with a plaid-like pattern of wood beams and sky-lights overhead and a wide glass slider that connects to the terraced backyard entertainment areas.

The fully-updated eat-in kitchen, also at the back of the house, has grey Italian tile flooring, sleek but warm walnut cabinetry, taupe-colored subway tile back splashes, some sort of engineered stone counter tops, high-grade commercial-style appliances (most but not all of which are stainless steel), and a cozy, sky-lit space for informal meals.

The four bedrooms are well-separated for privacy and include two guest/family bedrooms (plus at least one pooper) on the upper level, a main floor master suite with canyon view and sky-lit bathroom with walnut cabinetry and sea foam green tile work, and a possible fourth bedroom on the lower level with cork flooring and built-in bench seating. Mister Hall outfitted the lower level bedroom (with attached facility) with various body fitness devices to keep his muscles firm.

A lounging terrace tucked between the back of the house and the raised swimming pool has a built-in barbecue center and built-in fire pit. A concrete stair and path climbs up the hillside and around the back of the pool to an elevated dining terrace cantilevered over the plunge-sized swimming pool.

Mister Hall's neighborhood is well-known for its celebrity residents (and homeowners) who include surrealist filmmaker David Lynch, new mommy actress Charlize Theron, British action flick stud Jason Statham (who bought his house last year from Ben and Christine Stiller), octogenarian bon vivant, author/esssayist and social commentator Gore Vidal, Felicity Huffman and William H. Macy. Both Orlando Bloom and Kyle Maclachlan own homes in the Outpost Estates and have attempted to lease them out at various times.

listing photos: The Agency

Poppy Montgomery Puts Pac Pal Pad up for Grabs

SELLER: Poppy Montgomery
LOCATION: Pacific Palisades, CA
PRICE: $3,295,000
SIZE: 3,800 square feet, 4 bedrooms, 4 bathrooms

YOUR MAMAS NOTES: Family matters require brevity today, however rather than leave y'all completely high and dry we thought we'd quickly touch on the fully-renovated Pacific Palisades (CA) residence owned by Australian-born actress Poppy Montgomery (Unforgettable, Without a Trace, Murder in the Hamptons) and listed with an asking price of $3,295,000.

Property records show Miz Montgomery acquired her Pacific Palisades pad in January 2005 for $3,133,530. This would have been just before she hooked up with blue-eyed actor Adam Kaufman (NCIS, Melrose Place, Without a Trace) with whom she made a baby (out of wedlock) in late 2007. Miz Montgomery and Mister Kaufman split last year, a situation that may (or may not) have something to do with her desire to unload her house.

Current listing information shows the approximately 3,800 square foot Mediterranean, set high above the street behind a dense thicket of tropical landscaping, was originally built in 1930 and has a total of 4 bedrooms and 4 bathrooms including a staff/nanny/in-law bedroom with full bathroom with separate entrance.

Listing information and photographs show Miz Montgomery's has (what appears to be) knotty pine floors; a living room with fireplace and scrolled wrought iron details; a formal dining room with wood-beamed ceiling and French doors that open to a courtyard dining terrace; and a library, also with fireplace.

The cook-friendly kitchen has antique wood cabinetry, wood beamed ceiling, butcher block counter tops, pantry, and a center work island over which hands a pot rack that looks to Your Mama like it aches to snag some gal's beehive or drop a copper pot on some child's head. The kitchen opens to a somewhat petite family room with more wood beams across the ceiling and a built in entertainment storage cabinet. Listing information also shows the house has a basement, art studio and office.

The U-shaped house wraps around a narrow dining terrace that open up to a compact, tiki torch-lit backyard entertainment area with grass patch, more lush tropical landscaping, party-sized grotto spa with waterfall, fire pit and detached two-car garage.

listing photos: Prudential California / Brentwood

Glee Creator Ryan Murphy Flips Out in the Bu

SELLER: Ryan Murphy
LOCATION: Malibu, CA
PRICE: $6,995,000
SIZE: 2,095 square feet, 3 bedrooms, 3.5 bathrooms

YOUR MAMAS NOTES: Two years ago screenwriter and producer Ryan Murphy (Glee, Nip/Tuck, Eat Pray Love) signed a four-year deal with 20th Century Fox TV potentially worth up to $10,000,000 per year. As do many who find their bank accounts flooded with boo-coo bucks Mister Murphy soon went on a real estate spending spree.

In September 2010 he dropped ten million clams on a hacienda-style mansion in Beverly Hills, CA originally designed and built in the 1920s by architect Ralph Flewelling and restored by Oscar-winning actress Diane Keaton, one of Hollywood's most famous flippers of historically-minded residences.

The following summer Mister Murphy laid out another multi-million dollar bundle to buy another pricey property owned by another Oscar-winning actress, this time new single-mommy Charlize Theron. Property records and previous reports show the openly homosexual Hollywood hotshot paid Miz Theron $6,562,500 for her ocean-front getaway on Malibu's sandy La Costa Beach.

Just over a year after he signed on the deed's dotted line and acquired Miz Theron's real estate seconds Mister Murphy appears to have caught a case of The Celebrity Real Estate Fickle and this week flipped his beach front digs back on the (open) market with an asking price of $6,995,000.

Current listing information shows the two-story house sits—as most of them on the beach in the Bu do—cheek-to-jowl with the neighboring houses and sandwiched on a compact, .15-acre lot between the pounding surf and the typically traffic-choked Pacific Coast Highway. The well-maintained but modestly-scaled and somewhat non-descript house was originally built in 1930 and spans just 2,095 square foot with a total of with 3 bedrooms and 3.5 bathrooms. One of the bedrooms and bathrooms can be accessed via an exterior staircase in the walled, gated and heavily secured front courtyard and as such makes for a perfect guest bedroom, staff suite or in-law quarters.r

Listing photographs reveal Mister Murphy made few (if any) significant alterations to the architecture of the dwelling but did have a nice-gay or lady decorator work the place over with a strong and very expensive looking semi-nautical streak meant, we imagine, to look and feel "masculine" in the way that professionally decorated rooms are sometimes designed to give off a nice-gay or lady decorators version of butch and manly.

Anyhoo, Mister Murphy did opt to cover the wood floors in the living room and adjoining lanai with a rope-y sort of sisal but did retain the bay window seat and shallow inglenook fitted with built-in benches and a flagstone-faced fireplace surround in the living room. In the lanai it appears he (and his decorating team) opted to keep Miz Theron's blue and white striped upholstery on the built-in bench seating that rings the ocean-side, window-wrapped room. 

The sisal turns to grey slate tile—or some similar material—in the u-shaped kitchen where the custom, poured concrete counter tops and cabinetry still hold top-grade, commercial-style stainless steel appliances and the lower cabinets are fitted with wood doors painted jet black.

The (gay) ship's captain day-core downstairs continues up in the master bedroom—note the ship model on the mantel, the ship painting above the fireplace and the distressed, tufted leather wing back chair —finished with pale wood floors, a vaulted ceiling, wood-burning fireplace with contemporary concrete surround, built-in dressers tucked in to the eaves and direct ocean view. The attached master pooper has double sinks; a glass-enclosed shower lined with tiny, pale sea foam-colored tile; an over-sized soaking tub set into a bay with direct ocean view; and a second, tufted leather wing back chair where Mister Murphy can sit and clip his toe nails, lotion up his sun-baked legs or whatever.

In addition to the walled, street-side courtyard with its koi pond and blazing bougainvillea bush there's a sizable beach-side deck accessible through a wood-framed sliding glass door in the lanai. A glass rail along the deck's edge ensure unobstructed ocean views from the deck that's equipped with a built-in benches and dining cabana (with oh-so-nautical blue and white striped cushions), built-in fire pit, spa and outdoor shower. Private steps lead down to the beach.

The children may recall that last July Mister Murphy listed his two-residence compound high in the hills above Laguna Beach, CA with an asking price of $8,500,000. The hillside, ocean-view compound—with a main house worked over by sassy Million Dollar Decorator Mary McDonald—was de- an re-listed a couple of times before it was taken off the market in early December 2011.

listing photos: The Partners Trust

Claire Danes Lists Big Loft in Downtown NYC

SELLER: Claire Danes (and by marital extension Hugh Dancy)
LOCATION: New York City
PRICE: $5,998,000
SIZE: 3,851 square feet, 2 bedrooms, 3 bathrooms

YOUR MAMAS NOTES: Once again Your Mama and the children have our unofficial and unpaid (but hardly unappreciated) aide de camp Hot Chocolate to thank for digging up this sensational celebrity real estate truffle situated in downtown New York City. Just this week, as best as we can tell, movie and television actress Claire Danes put her large and luxe but low-key loft in SoHo on the open market with an asking price of $5,998,000. Taxes and common charges show on current listing information as totaling $2,791 per month, a lot of money for most folks, but pretty damn low for a loft this size in Manhattan.

The classic, California blond—raised primarily in New York City and married to Primetime Emmy-nominated British actor Hugh Dancy (Hannibal, The Big C, Our Idiot Brother, Elizabeth I, Black Hawk Down) in fall 2009—started her swift climb up the ladder of fame and fortune in the mid-1990s as a teen aged television star on My So-Called Life, a role for which she received an Emmy nomination, a Golden Globe and legions of dedicated fans. She quickly moved on to the silver screen with plum parts in Little Women, How to Make an American Quilt, Romeo + Juliet and a bunch of other chic-flicks and rom-coms Your Mama ain't never heard of let alone seen.

At 18—or maybe she was 19—Miss Danes put her burgeoning Showbiz career on hold and moved to New Haven, CT in order to matriculate at Yale. Before she moved in to her shared dormitory like a typical college freshman, she splashed out on a very grown-up-sized loft in Manhattan's SoHo neighborhood, the same once arty-farty now steroidally-commercial downtown 'hood where she grew up in a big ol' loft with her artist parents.

We regret to inform that property records are a mite confusing on this one. It's clear she picked the place up in fall 1998 but StreetEasy show she paid $624,750 and at least one other database we consulted shows she coughed up an exponentially more substantial $4,633,312 for the nearly 4,000 square foot loft that was then just raw space. Someone besides Your Mama will likely get to the meat of that matter but until then make of the vast discrepancy what you will.

Anyhoo, she only lasted a couple of years at Yale, dropping out, so the story goes, to focus on her career. Like most successful actresses, she's had a couple dry spells but none-the-less appeared in an impressive number of small and big screen films including The Hours, Terminator 3: Rise of the Machines, and The Family Stone. More recently Missus Danes-Dancy found critical acclaim as an autistic scientist and livestock advocate in the 2010 tee-vee movie Temple Grandin for which she earned a Golden Globe statuette and last year she took a star turn on the boob-toob in the series Homeland, which earned her a third Golden Globe.


Soon after signing on the deed's dotted line in 1998, teen aged and rich Miss Danes hired New York architect Joan Krevlin of BKS/K Architects to work the place over. Shortly after the extensive renovation was complete the loft was photographed in all it's glossy, whimsical, mid-century modern infused glory for the March 2000 issue of Architectural Digest. Listing images indicate no substantial alterations to the architecture and/or day-core have been made since then.

Half a dozen rugged and exposed wood support posts run like a spine down the center of the capacious 2 bedroom and 3 bathroom loft that Miz Krevlin painstakingly parsed in to distinct but inter-connected and somewhat flexible spaces using a series of stationary and sliding semi-translucent panels, free-standing entertainment centers and book cases, varied ceiling heights and carefully aligned closets. Only the two bedrooms at the rear of the loft can be completely closed off from the airy, light-filled 85-foot long open-plan main living space.

The direct entry elevator peels open to a foyer flanked by a discreetly situated three-quarter guest bathroom and a small, shelf-lined office/library that can be opened to or separated from the main living area by a sliding panel of honeycomb pattern LUMAsite, a material that repeats throughout the loft.

The not-very-formal formal living room has a quartet of over-sized windows that face the street and the architect fashioned a kind of inglenook in front of the asymmetrical fireplace with a slightly dropped ceiling for intimacy and a caramel-colored leather tile floor for tactile coziness.

Of course, as delish as that leather floor may be for the bare- and sock-footed we're certain it requires the loft's resident(s) hire a tight-faced scold named Heather or Helga to indelicately shoo tipsy, spike-heeled party goers away from the delicate leather floor during parties. Imagine waking up some afternoon after a boozy evening and discovering party guests made punctures all over your leather floor? That would most definitely not be a good way to spend a blood curdling hangover, would it?

A free-standing, approximately armpit-height entertainment center with book cases stands between the buttoned-up but down-to-earth "formal" living room and dining areas where Missus Danes-Dancy has a multi-colored collection of molded plastic Eames armchairs set around a mid-century modern version of a farmhouse table that may or may not be made of teak.

An unexpected, curved wall of semi-translucent panels separates the "formal" living and dining areas from the spacious so-called Great Room where six French doors do not open to a terrace but do let in a ton of light from the south and east. The so-called Great Room was decoratively done less like an interior space than an outdoor area with a a full-sized hammock and an old-timey rope swing that hangs from the rafters.

Now, children, Your Mama has been in scores of lofts in lower Manhattan outfitted with rope swings, tire swings, porch swings and of all types of swings—wink, wink—but we have yet to come across one with a goddamn hammock. It's a quirky and possibly questionable addition to an urban interior space, made more so by its pairing with an iconic and expensive Arne Jacobson 'Egg' chair and ottoman, but Your Mama and The Dr. Cooter both love it like the dickens. Imagine the luxury of space in lower Manhattan to have a hammock in your so-called Great Room?

Adding to the kinetic whimsy of Missus Danes-Dancy's downtown digs is a pivoting table that can be swung around to the kitchen for extra prep space or rotated back around in to the inside curl of the curving, semi-translucent wall where it can be used for casual meals, scrap booking marathons, jig-saw puzzle solving, bill baying and a myriad of other things we can't be bothered to list.

The curving semi-translucent wall partially obscures the clean-lined and expensively-equipped kitchen from the front area of the loft. The kitchen, entirely comprised of a single bank of flat-fronted Maple cabinetry, has all the usual high-grade, commercial-style stainless steel appliances, expensive-looking counter tops, and an extra-deep soap stone farm sink. The architect cleverly and smartly tucked a walk-in pantry and discrete service entry with laundry equipment and broom closet behind the kitchen. Your Mama swoons with envy over that walk-in pantry. We just love us a walk-in pantry.

At the rear of the apartment a short corridor that can be closed off with a pocket door extends off the so-called Great Room and connects to a hall pooper and the lone guest bedroom with its one, rather puny window and single-wide closet just barely big enough to make a weekend house guest feel welcome but way to small to accommodate an extended stay.

The master suite, nestled privately in to a quiet corner of the loft, has a spacious walk-in closet/dressing area and an attached bathroom with scored concrete floors, white subway tile and a soaking tub set in to an angled, pill-shaped niche with a mottled, sky blue sponge treatment that looks to our untrained eye more like pigment than paint. As per the Architectural Digest article, the bedroom itself was originally divided with a stationary, honeycomb pattern LUMAsite panel into two areas, one for sleeping and another for exercising. We don't know if that division remains in place.

Miz Danes-Dancy's loft looks like a downright bargain compared to the only other loft in the building currently on the (open) market with an asking price of $9,750,000. That loft, an H-shaped behemoth, has 4,800 square feet inside with another 560 square feet of exterior space, according to current listing information. The nearly ten million dollar top floor spread also happens to be the last unit to sell in the building in March 2010 for $7,750,000.

listing photos and floor plan: Town Residential

Amy Winehouse's Father Lists Her London Bedsit

SELLER: estate of Amy Winehouse
LOCATION: London, U.K.
PRICE: £2,699,950
SIZE: (approximately) 2,500 square feet, 3 bedrooms, 2 full and 2 half bathrooms

YOUR MAMAS NOTES: Listen children there has been a death in Your Mama's family—RIP Meemaw—so we've been a bit sluggish in getting to some of the hottest stories the last week or so and expect we'll be bringing up the celebrity real estate rear for another week.

In an effort to fill in a few of the many gaps we left gaping last week, over the next couple days we're going to briefly give our meaningless two cents about a few stories that some of y'all may (or may not) have already heard and/or read. Iffin that's the case, and you're just so over this big of celebrity property business, then move along little doggy. Your Mama will have some fresh meat for you to gnash at and gnaw on soon enough. Capisce? Capisce.

Everybody knows throwback (and throw-it-down) rocker Amy Winehouse died tragically and young—she was just 27—in July 2011 when she, quite literally, drank herself to death inside her walled and gated, Georgian-style home on London's Camden Square.

After months of mulling, Miss Winehouse's estate–managed by her father Mitch—has opted to sell his deceased daughter's architecturally dignified semi-detached and recently listed the structurally and cosmetically renovated and upgraded residence with an asking price of £2,699,950. A quick consult with Your Mama's currency conversion contraption reveals that amounts to 4,146,450 U.S. dollars at today's rates.

Miss Winehouse's modestly-scaled if hardly-inexpensive house measures about 2,500 square feet over 4 floors with a total of 3 bedrooms and 2 full and 2 half bathrooms. A stoop set in the walled and gated front garden opens to a long entry/stair hall with dark mocha-colored hardwood floors, crisp white walls, period moldings and, at the back under the stairs, a could-still-use-a-redo powder pooper.

The dark wood floors continue into the sitting room at the rear of the main floor outfitted with more period moldings, a decorative fireplace flanked by open shelving and a broad bay window with back garden view. The eat-in kitchen at the front of the house has vinyl black and white checkerboard flooring, glossy black lacquer cabinetry, jet black granite counter tops and a pair of side-by-side vintage-style white fridge/freezers.

One floor below, in the all-but-above-ground, wood-floored basement, there's a sound-proofed family room slathered an unholy shade of lipstick red paint, a modernized half crapper and a still-fully-equipped home gym with French doors that connect to the back garden. It's hard to believe all this equipment was used by Miss Winehouse who never looked particularly healthy or fit. Thin maybe, but robust, no. Whatever.

On the second floor—that's the first for for Brits—two guest/family bedrooms with custom wardrobes share a hall bathroom. One more flight up the full-floor master suite has a vaulted ceiling; over-sized wardrobe-lined dressing room; separate bedroom; and adjoining, en suite facility with black and white marble tile work, separate, glass-enclosed shower and freestanding and claw-footed soaking tub set unnecessarily at a catty wompus angle

A walled and gated courtyard at the front of the property probably didn't see much use by Miss Winehouse who was regularly besieged by fans and paparazzi outside her front gate. The area opposite her former home is still treated as a bit of a shrine with an apron of flowers, candles, and notes written to and/or about the multiple Grammy winner. The rear garden—unfortunately only accessible via a potentially treacherous trek through the gym—perhaps saw more use by the usually very pale-skinned Miss Winehouse with its sunken stone terrace, small patch of grass and tree- and shrubbery-ringed perimeter.

There has been a bit of brouhaha, we've bee told by a Brit or two, instigated by some of Miss Winehouse's still-faithful fans who feel Daddy Winehouse is profiteering by the sale of his deceased daughter's house. We're not sure what these people think Mister Winehouse ought to do with the multi-million dollar mini-manse where his daughter lived and died in such a dreadful and deadly (if wildly creative) manner. Move in to it?

We know there was talk of running some sort of Amy Winehouse foundation out of the house but, be honest, would you want to go to work in the same house where your 20-something year old, global superstar daughter met her early and ugly end? What we say isn't worth the time it takes to type it but as far as we're concerned Mummy and Daddy Winehouse ought to do what they need to do to settle their hearts no doubt left jagged by the loss of their daughter and if it's selling her damn house, then sell the damn house.

listing photos and floor plan: HouseNetwork.co.uk via RightMove.co.uk